5 reasons for feeling lonely after marriage and ways to deal with it

Loneliness is a state of mind in which a person desires social contact, but feels isolated from others. If you've ever felt alone in a crowd, you can understand that being surrounded by other people doesn't necessarily cure the feeling of isolation and loneliness. This is why some people suffer from loneliness after marriage.

BingMag.com 5 reasons for feeling lonely after marriage and ways to deal with it

Loneliness is a state of mind in which a person desires social contact, but feels isolated from others. If you've ever felt alone in a crowd, you can understand that being surrounded by other people doesn't necessarily cure the feeling of isolation and loneliness. This is why some people suffer from loneliness after marriage.

You may spend time with your spouse, but feel lonely even in his presence. Research shows that about 33% of married people over 45 feel lonely. In this article from BingMag, we talk about the reasons for feeling lonely among married people and ways to deal with it. Stay with us.

Signs of loneliness in married people

Living with another person is not a cure for loneliness. The feeling you have about the connection with your spouse is something that can make you feel isolated and alone. Some signs that you are lonely despite being together include:

  • You feel lonely even when you are together. There seems to be a gap between There are you who don't know how to fix it.
  • You don't talk to each other. Maybe you don't like to talk to your partner about everyday things or maybe you feel that your partner is not interested in talking. you don't have Either way, you don't communicate, and this leads to feelings of isolation and frustration.
  • You find reasons to stay away from your spouse. Stay at work or use the internet and check social media to avoid interacting with him.
  • You don't have sex or rarely have sex. Your relationship doesn't. Not only does it lack emotional intimacy, but it also lacks physical intimacy.

All these factors can lead to feelings of loneliness after marriage. Sometimes only one of the couple feels lonely, but in most cases both parties are affected.

Reasons of feeling lonely after marriage

BingMag.com 5 reasons for feeling lonely after marriage and ways to deal with it

Research shows that feelings of loneliness have increased in recent years. A 2018 survey found that people who are unhappy with their family life are more likely to feel lonely. In addition, the increase in loneliness is likely to be worsened by the coronavirus pandemic. Because people's social communication has become very limited and this has created a lot of pressure for many married people.

In the past, people used to communicate with friends, colleagues, etc. to fulfill part of their social needs. , but these days, due to Corona, they have to rely only on their wives. So when your partner can't meet all of these demands, you may feel unsupported. Other reasons for feeling lonely after marriage are:

1. Work and family

One of the most common reasons why couples feel lonely is the pressures related to family and work. If both of you have busy lives with taking care of your children, fulfilling work responsibilities, etc., you rarely get to spend time together as a couple, which makes you feel disconnected from your partner.

2. Stressful Events

Sometimes challenges that couples face create cracks in a relationship that lead to feelings of loneliness after marriage. A stressful or traumatic event can affect even the strongest relationships, but if it exposes or magnifies the weaknesses in your life together, it becomes harder to deal with.

For example, if you lose your job. If you feel that your spouse does not support you or does not sympathize with you, the situation becomes more difficult for you. In these cases, you may still feel lonely even after the stressful event is over.

3. Unrealistic expectations

In some cases, your feelings of loneliness may not have much to do with your partner and may be related to other unmet needs. For example, you cannot establish good relationships with people around you and expect your partner to fulfill all your social needs. Because you cannot reasonably expect such a thing from your spouse, it is not surprising that you end up feeling dissatisfied.

4. Lack of vulnerability

Vulnerability shows our willingness to take risks and talk about our inner emotions. If you don't talk to your partner about your deepest feelings, including your dreams and fears, it becomes harder to connect with them, and as a result, you feel isolated. Because your wife is unaware of your inner feelings and cannot understand you.

5. Comparison with social media

Unrealistic comparison with relationships that are on social media Being depicted can also lead to feelings of loneliness after marriage. According to research, people who spend more time on social media experience higher levels of loneliness.

Negative effects of feeling lonely after marriage

BingMag.com 5 reasons for feeling lonely after marriage and ways to deal with it

Loneliness is a painful emotional experience. It's also one that many people don't talk about. Unfortunately, research shows that this feeling can have negative effects on physical and mental health, including:

  • Increased alcohol and drug use
  • Increased risk of depression
  • Weakened immune system
  • Increased risk of cardiovascular diseases and stroke

When you feel lonely in your married life, it is possible Be less inclined to engage in healthy behaviors such as exercising or eating healthy. This problem can even affect your sleep or cause stress and create negative thoughts, all of which are harmful to your health. If you're feeling lonely or isolated, there are steps you can take to help.

Talk to your spouse

The first step is to talk to your partner about how you're feeling. Talk and see if he feels the same way. If you both feel lonely, you can probably work on this so that you can reconnect and find a deeper sense of togetherness. become harder If your partner is emotionally supportive but you still feel lonely, there's probably something else going on inside you that you need to work on.

Avoid blame

As you try to Overcome loneliness after marriage, be careful not to blame your spouse. This makes her defensive.

Instead of telling your partner, "You never talk to me about the things that happen to me during the day," try talking to your partner. Focus on your feelings and needs and say, I was feeling lonely and you would have helped me if you had asked me about my experiences and feelings.

Spend more time together

BingMag.com 5 reasons for feeling lonely after marriage and ways to deal with it

The demands of everyday life and performing family and work duties make it difficult for many couples to focus on married life. To solve this problem, it is better to determine a suitable time to communicate and talk to each other.

Limiting the use of social media may also be useful. As research shows, heavy use of social media may lead to increased feelings of isolation and loneliness. It also makes you have unrealistic expectations about your relationship. When you see other people's lives and relationships, you may feel negative about yourself.

Limiting your use of social media has other benefits. For example, it gives you more time to connect with your partner. If you find yourself constantly checking social media instead of talking to your partner, find a time and place to put your phone away and focus on your marriage instead.

Professional Help Get it

If you still feel lonely after marriage despite using the above strategies, talk to a therapist. Couples therapy can be very effective and address issues related to trust, intimacy, empathy, and communication.

The therapist will teach you how to communicate with each other and develop strong communication skills and help you with issues that have affected your marriage, work on it.

Final Word

Feelings of loneliness among married people can be caused by many reasons. Family, work and stress often contribute to this problem, but internal factors such as unrealistic expectations and fear of vulnerability can also make it difficult for couples to communicate.

If you feel lonely in your married life, it is important to Find out why it occurs and learn how to deal with it. If the solutions mentioned in this article are not effective in solving the feeling of loneliness after marriage, you should see a therapist.

This article is only for education and information purposes. Before using the recommendations of this article, be sure to consult a specialist doctor. For more information, read BingMag Disclaimer.

Source: verywellmind

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