Forbes’ critical satirical view; How can Hollywood help the global warming crisis?

Michael Lynch, an oil economy analyst, takes a sarcastic and critical look at Hollywood's role in helping to solve the global warming crisis in an article from Forbes magazine.

BingMag.com Forbes’ critical satirical view; How can Hollywood help the global warming crisis?

Michael Lynch, an oil economy analyst, takes a sarcastic and critical look at Hollywood's role in helping to solve the global warming crisis in an article from Forbes magazine.

One recent article described a startup that wanted to reduce the "carbon footprint" of cinema, and while I'm very much in favor of the idea, I don't think it should limit itself. that people are forced to go to the ceremony by train; Like the recent Goya Awards ceremony in Spain, where the food served included low-carbon chicken and fish.

Of course, Hollywood has played its part in educating the public about global warming. With so many movies revolving around evil oil companies destroying part or all of the planet; Like Thanos from the Marvel universe, who in his own way encouraged people to control the population, and Scaramanga, the villain of the James Bond series, who tried to deprive the world of solar energy. And then there's The Walking Dead, whose early characters eschew fossil fuel-powered vehicles in favor of, well, walking. zero carbon; Rotting meats, however, will likely result in some nasty greenhouse gas emissions.

On the other hand, one of this summer's top-grossing movies was Top Gun, which featured a lot of carbon-inducing characters. like the F-18 and P-51. (Rumor has it that a few humans were in the movie.) Considering that using a jet afterburner triples an airplane's fuel consumption, which is about a thousand gallons per hour for an F-18 fighter jet, We must limit future air battles. At best, the speed limit is 55 mph, and perhaps the sequel, Top Gun: Not as Maverick, will feature a battle between electric cars. p>

And although western movies (which in the dark ages, we called them "cowboy movies") rarely mention the use of petroleum materials, the metals and materials used to make pistols are definitely energy intensive. . Water guns should be used instead of these guns, and plastic guns should be used in dry areas. Oh, and the herds of wild cattle should be replaced with ostriches and other animals that are more environmentally friendly. Watching the violent criminals try to tame the ostriches is worth the investment.

Films about ancient battles often feature scenes in which people fight the enemy in an oil-covered field. They set a trap and then set it on fire. In the future, vegetable oils should be used for this purpose. And instead of using steel swords that have high latent energy, fighters can use swimming noodles. In the next Robin Hood movie (you know there's bound to be another one), his gang will plant trees to fight the flames of the Nottingham witch in his cold palace. slow to exhibit a lower carbon footprint. Thanksgiving dinner should serve plant-based turkey as the main course, the Irish should eat corned beef and chia, and characters from Southwestern stories should ditch burritos for poboi (oysters made from better, more responsible sources). They can also take Bino or anti-flatulence medicine before meals in the movies.

The "Fast and the Furious" franchise can be recreated; "Fast and the Emissionless" could be an opportunity to subtly advertise Huffy or Shym bikes. In the remake of the famous movie "The Wild One", which was about the motorcycle gang, the electric Vespa engine can be used; until the biker gang invades the city and takes over all the vehicle charging stations.

In "Godfather 4" (Godfather 4) Don Corleone will be the governor of California, and he will offer electric vehicles to the residents of the city. given that they cannot refuse - because of the authority of the government. In the new version of Conan the Barbarian, instead of destroying the cult temple, the main character can recycle its building materials and use them to insulate low-cost houses. The next Iron Man movie should be called Hemp Man, and the Hulk movie could create a new ending where "Hulk destroys fossil fuel-consuming factories." Let's not forget the DC Universe, Wonder Woman's invisible plane could run on plant fuel, Aquaman could be shown as a capitalist making money from tidal energy, and Batman's Batplane could be replaced by a Batglider.

In "Toy Story 5" (Toy Story 5) -or 6?- "Towards pure zero, and beyond!" shouts Lightyear again. The Lego movies will feature wooden blocks, and in Star Wars, the Death Star should be solar-powered, which would allow it to destroy a planet every 687 years instead of destroying it. limited "Jurassic Park" could feature paleontologist Sam O'Neill raising brachiosaurus to sell their dried pelts to reduce energy consumption, and in future "Predator" movies, the monster will always hunt people who They use a lot of energy (but not celebrities).

And finally, movie theaters should no longer serve drinks and giant popcorn; But we have to admit that this one is really going to be science fiction.

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